SOMETIMES WE FORGET THAT EVERY PATH MUST BE TAKEN, NO MATTER HOW CONFUSING THE OUTCOME MAY BE
BOLVERK THE SMITH
LUCIUS
[/color] He whispered, voice hoarse and words laced with weariness.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] Lucius would need it. Carefully he helped his son take in as much as he could before laying his head down and placing the mug off to the side. Bolverk remained standing as he looked down at Lucius.
"How do you feel?"[/ul]
LUCIUS[/color] He replied softly.
"How...long have you been in MacLeod Territory?" Lucius dared to ask, partly regretting the answer.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] Lucius had won, but it was not a winning that Bolverk felt was worthy at the moment. Too many shadows lingered over the reasoning of the duel in the first place. Bolverk finally gave in and pulled the chair up behind him so his tall form could take a seat. He stared at Lucius for some time before he spoke again.
"I have also been informed and questioned by the chieftain about your secret marriage to his daughter. Sadly, I had no knowledge to give him on that matter or the matter that my son not only married but could be a father due to his experiences and not have his own father aware." Bolverk watched his son's face before he went on.
"I think it would be wise if you told me your version of the story. Start from why you married a woman not of your class and risked not only your life, but others'. Yes, that is a good place for my only son to begin to his only father." While the words should have held a bite in the tone, Bolverk had kept it pretty leveled.[/ul]
LUCIUS[/color] Lucius admitted softly and yet still there was a silent strength to them.
"That is why we married in secret...because I was a squire and it would be frowned upon and forbidden. Once I became a knight, I would ask her father, publicly...and save her reputation. That did not go as planned...but while I was aware of our classes...I did not let it determine my fate...or ours." He replied. Unable to hold his father's gaze for much longer, Lucius glanced to the side to gain some composure back.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] Bolverk reached a hand to the back of his neck and sighed slowly.
"You should have told me. It has put us in a very...uneasy position. One that could ruin your knighthood and my business as a blacksmith. The steps you take do not only affect you, they affect me as well because I am your father." Bolverk's face had softened, but now turned serious once more.
"This is not the first time you have kept things from me Lucius. You seem to be making a habit of it. One...you share with your mother. The things I kept from you, did not affect anyone else. They only affected your feelings of being loved." Bolverk slowly rose from the bed and stared down at Lucius.
"Did you stop to think that this would mean much more than simply to feel the warmth of a woman beside you? Had she been a fishermen's daughter, or even another blacksmith's daughter it would have been very different. But she is born of certain responsibilities Lucius. You did not think and it is not becoming of the boy I called my son."[/ul]
LUCIUS[/color] Lucius pointed out, somewhat defensively. He did forget the responsibilities and duties that Siobhan had; what came with her title did not sink in...until now.
"I did not tell you, father, because I wanted to protect your reputation. How could you be found faulty if you knew nothing of it? Clearly, that ignorance has saved you trouble. I did not forget you, father and your reputation as a blacksmith. You are my father...and I would not be your son if I ignored what matters so much to you. But, I am fully responsible for my own actions...and so I took them as my own." Lucius answered, pausing to take a breath. It was more than simply feeling loved by Siobhan physically...that was something his father seemed to forget the day his wife betrayed him.
"I did not marry her simply to feel the warmth of her body beside mine. I love her, father...something you have forgotten because my mother spat on her love for you. Had I simply wanted a woman to sleep with, I would have taken your offer to attend the brothel." A cold comment from Lucius had his dark eye staring up at his father, somewhat defiantly. Lucius would not be scorned for his choice for he held no regrets...even if things did not go completely as planned.
"If I waited, father, the man I fought would take her hand in marriage...or someone else. I couldn't wait...and neither could Siobhan. It is better to have love and loss than not at all." Or so the stories projected.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] Again Lucius repeated how he loved Siobhan and how she loved him. Bolverk resisted snarling at his son and the repetitive phrase over and over again. It was as if he thought his father did not hear that part, but Bolverk had. He also knew that Lucius and Siobhan were very young, which meant the puppy love could fade. Then what would happen?
"You might be responsible, but I do not wish to see my son beheaded. That is a torment no father should bare and yet you cast me into that?" Lucius seemed to be growing a sharp tongue, for when he said his father seemed to forget love because of Varmia, Bolverk paused and looked to his son. Hurt flashed in his eyes and this time, Bolverk did not even try to hide it. Eyes lowered from Lucius as he spoke of wanting to marry her before someone else did. Slowly, Bolverk sat back down in the chair.
"You are right. Your mother did hurt me very much. I allowed her in...the very first person ever into my whole world. I kept nothing from her, told her no lies and was completely faithful. I gave her my whole heart Lucius. All of it. I did everything to please her, including giving her a son she so longed for. She betrayed me, lied to me and kept things from me. I swore to myself I would never let anyone else that close to me again. But I could not deny you Lucius. You with your wide eyes and toothless smile. Like your mother, you got every last bit of my heart and you were allowed in where others had not been. Now you have kept things from me and lied to me. I am trying very hard to not feel so betrayed by the second person I gave my heart to and loved....but it is very hard." Bolverk sounded tired and the hurt in his father's face remained on his harden features. The difference was that Bolverk would never try to kill his son. He could never bring himself to do it.[/ul]
LUCIUS[/color] Lucius retorted, before that sharp tongue came and Lucius regretted it. The look on his father's face...it tore at his heart. Having seen Bolverk truly look upset and hurt only a handful of times, if at all, played upon his conscience. Lucius frowned, and watched his father closely.
"Forgive me, father...I spoke too harshly.." He whispered, almost begging for Bolverk to forgive his words. Slowly, his father sat back down in the chair, and Lucius could feel his heart dissolving in his stomach. He listened, quietly, to his father and at the mention of not wanting to feel betrayed...Lucius felt moisture sting his eyes. Had he truly hurt his father to the same extent as his mother? Now, Lucius was not so sure of himself anymore.
"I beg for your forgiveness, father...I meant not to betray you as mother had...forgive me, father.." And without thinking, Lucius sat up partly. Instantly, he regretted it as pain shot through his body like lightning. He winced, but even such intensive pain seemed dull in comparison to the agony of his father's gaze and expression. Eyes glossed over in tears but had yet to fall.
"I swear to you...I kept this from you to protect you...so you would not be blamed or held accountable for my actions...I did not want to bring shame upon your name...but it seems I have." That stone wall vanished and every bit of sadness and guilt played upon his features. His brows furrowed and his eyes turned red in places as he held back tears.
"I am sorry father...I wish not to be like mother...I never wanted to cause you pain..." Bolverk could evoke emotion from him so easily...only his father.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] Bolverk rose from his chair to loom over Lucius and push him back.
"Easy my son. Lay back. You cannot move in this condition." Bolverk paused and looked to his son's face. He simply wanted to ease him now.
"Lucius...you are not like your mother. I am sorry that my words made you think I believed that. You will never be like her. I know you are a kind soul and I am proud of you. Despite how this has shocked me, I am proud of the man I think you will become." When Lucius went back again, Bolverk stood up.
"I have always been proud of you. I am sorry I have not said it enough. You are my son and I love you. I will always be behind your choices, which means you must make them more clearly."[/ul]
LUCIUS[/color] Lucius whispered, lifting a hand to grasp Bolverk's forearm. Even though his grip was weak, he still tried to give it a squeeze.
"I am proud to be your son...You have done so much for me...I have not nor shall I forget.." And Lucius meant that.[/ul]
BOLVERK THE SMITH[/color] He pulled back from Lucius' grasp slowly as if he did not want to hurt his son more before he moved his heavy frame towards the door. Right hand reached for it and opened it wide, but before he stepped through he paused between the frame to look back at Lucius.
"Lucius. I have done many things in my life that will never be looked upon as good. Some; while not regrets, do haunt me a great deal. I pray you never have to hear of such things." Bolverk paused again then continued.
"Remember that everything I have done, every path I took has lead you to where you are today. That is my only reason for not regretting those things that I should. I pray you make it yours as well." He did not wait for a response before he moved from the door frame and closed the door gently behind him. Heavy steps haunted the hallway as he went to find a servant to get his son some much needed food. [/ul][/font]
LOWER THE CURTAIN
