Post by Ursula Darling on Apr 8, 2009 21:26:44 GMT -6
Ursula: Days played out like a sad instrumental melody, the engagement party of her, well lover, was in a few days and she had been helping the Lord McCulla, her lovers intended's father in planning the event. The fact of the matter was, she had never planned an event but something seemed to stick more then anything else. A Midsummer Nights Dream, it was a tale of star crossed lovers, one person in love with someone who was in fact in love with another. It was coupled with fairy tale creatures like Satyr's and Fairies. The tale seemed fitting and only with a week or so to plan and then set up, it had been a whirlwind of a dance, one thing after the other. It did not help that she had to dodge Marke at every turn. Making a decision and sticking to it was perhaps the hardest thing a person could do. There were so many chances to turn back until the outcome was met, everything was a temptation. Usually riding would of calmed down but she could only 'steal' a horse from Moira so many times before even the stables were under lock and key. Not that posed a problem, Ursula knew how to pick even the hardest and most complicated lock within the world. What else was there to do? Shop? That meant spending money and not having any for a long time had made her tight pursed. No, she finally resolved to visit Alen, get a pep talk, yes get an ego boost in some way but when she arrived at the Ebony Hall, he wasn't there. That only made the irritation of the past few days even more unbearable. "Is the course still set up outback in courtyard?"She asked one of the workers.
Servant:The woman carrying a bowl of which who's contents even Ursula did not want to know, stared at her as if the woman was mad. "Yes..but...It's raining..."She commented simply.
Ursula:Ursula turned a pointed stare down at the woman. "I know.." She commented back before moving past the woman. Ebony Hall had quickly become somewhat of a second home so she did not feel guilt at intruding. Even in the spring downpour, Ursula had spent hours working the course. How was it going? She was muddy from head to toe and would be bruised in places she would never know you could get bruises by morning! As she grunted against the wood, straining to get over the wall of one part of it, she slipped and crashed into a mud puddle, for perhaps the fifth time. With a growl, she slapped at the mud puddle before leaning back against the wooden wall with a sigh. Alen had thought she was a star pupil and she couldn't' even make it over a damn wall!
Vance: "Well look at that." as things couldn't get bad enough in her torment, the last man she wished to see was watching. Alendral was currently maddening himself picking up pieces after the siege and the attack on Janice. In fact, the entire hall seemed breathless in distracted in the face of what happened. Arms crossed over his chest, nearly empty bottle in hand, the Rogue looked both horribly amused and utterly disgusted by what he saw. "Tryin' to keep yourself limber for the clients or just guilty enough to put half an effort into it for once?" the words slurred into one another, heedless of the rain, with a raw, emotional edge in his voice that was unmistakable--god, even his eyes were bloodshot. "Please... think it's fairly obvious only way your gonna be of any use is on your back, woman. Not foolin' anyone with your half-assed tries tonight." Was Vance being unfair? of course he was. The courses were difficult enough as is--soaked by rain they were nightmares, and were ALen to observe he would have balked at the idea, tried to pull her off the wall before she seriously hurt herself. "Pfft. Look at you. What's the matter? Last boy refuse to kiss you on the mouth?" he let himself smile, dark and vicious. Even in his bite, it was obvious--he was just looking for a way to get under her skin. Vance was looking to set her off.
Ursula: Her head jerked upward at the sound of the voice. At least the downfall was washing the mud off her face but she doubted getting the goopy mess out of her boots for a very long time. He was the last person in even hell(if she ever decided to believe in it) she wanted to see. "That's for me to know and you to never find out.."She shot back as she wiggled from the muddy pit the rain had created. "You know, you remind me of Marke sometimes Vance, except without the charm, the well...clean clothes and.."She leaned in, sniffed then jerked back with a disgusted look on her face."ug, the smell either..". Jerking the bottle from his hand, she surveyed the contents before turning swiftly to toss the bottle against the rain soaked wall. The bottle crashed and splintered, large to small glass shards seemed to glitter with the rain then disappeared, down into the mud. As irritated as she was, this was the least of what she could of done, she had only thought better of punching his ugly little face in. "What's the matter Vance? Jealous much?" She sneered as she turned back in his direction.
Vance: "And more money then sense, which is where it counts, doesn't it?" Seemed at least someone was more successful in their attempts, because the comparison was enough to make his skin crawl. "Hey!" he swore profusely as she bashed what was left of his bottle and that was it, between the stealing of his comfort and the dared suggestion that he was somehow jealous of her was enough to break what little control he had. "Jealous... JEALOUS!? The hell do you know, you selfish little tart!?" he grabbed both her arms and pushed her back than, eyes wide and almost animal, and he almost laughed. "Jesus christ you stupid bytch... Will you even look around 'ya!? You notice the halls thinning!? You notice how tired everyone looks! Half of the god-damn Noviates are DEAD and you're runnin' around tyin' up the boss to take care of your little social problems! Where were you, huh!? Where were you 'n all this? Stagin' a play? On your back with some lonely little rich bastard? Go on, tell me! You even know what the boss is doin' right now, huh? Or did you just assume..he'd have time, for your BULLchyt!?"
Ursula: She detested alcohol, it numbed the senses and make even the most hardened tongues loose, and the dumbest tongues to loose. Besides, he seemed to find comfort in the end of a bottle and what comfort she could ruin. Well, that was enough to satisfy her. Her jaw clenched as he shoved her back, she stumbled a step or two before recovering and shoving against him even as he brandished harsh and well, mean, words in her direction. "What the hell do you know you self absorbed jackass?! I have eyes wide open you a-hole! I see what's going on and I was smart enough to stay out of it and not join the dead! I am no where near ready to fight and I don't intend to waste the chance Alen gave me because YOU think little of me." She shoved again, fist balled, pounding against his chest. "Social Events?! As if I enjoy what's going on. I made a choice, not that you have any damn part in that! I'm making the hardest decision I ever had in putting my life into this business, into something that may as well kill me in the end!Alen may see more in me then I see myself, but I'll be damned if I disappoint him and I let some sniveling little dirty backhanded drunken criminal with a little girl complex try to run me off. f**k you Vance, you don't know a damn thing about me or what I'm going through.." In truth his words had hit her deep, she felt indeed...shallow and cruel, she did indeed get to self absorbed to notice what was going around her. Why hadn't she been called on? As unskilled as she was to fight, truly fight, had she turned her back on the order when they needed every available hand? She didn't let him see though, how his words had effected her, her face a stock shallow emptiness mixed with the rage. He saw her for exactly what she felt, and what Alen tried to dispel and that only made her all the madder.
Vance: Little girl complex was the last thing to say to Vance. he might have, however briefly, taken stock of her words if it didn't come with that, and for all his poise (or lack thereof) that sentiment turned his expression into pure hatred and he slapped the woman with a fair amount of force (to his credit, it was restrained enough considering how hard he could hit, however little that may have counted.) He didn't even say anything for a moment than, just glared daggers at her. "Don't you... ever call the dead stupid. They weren't ready either, you bytch. None of them were, but they fought and died to help anyway...!" of course Vance couldn't have known that Alen didn't call for her--that, quite the opposite, he had told her to stay in her chambers and to wait things out. to him, it was the sign of a coward and nothing more. "I went out there, and I fought for them, and I kept them alive, and that's more than you can say, so don't you... ever f**king question that. " he paused, wiped his mouth, hiding his anger neatly behind disrespect for the dead, till he blew it. "..And don't you talk about her like that ever again. Not ever. She's innocent." he finally had let her go during all this, rubbing his face and trying desperately to calm himself again. "And she's not wastin' our valuable time takin' care of some f**kin' inbred bastard followin' his richard... she nearly died. You're still here. Evidence of no God if I saw anythin'." the bitter hints of what perhaps made him so angry.
Ursula: She hadn't expected him to slap her, advance yes, shove, more definitely but the strike caught her off guard, her head jerked to the side before she brought it back, a hand rose to press against the faint throb of her cheek and lips were his hand had connected. For a moment the shock registered on her face before the mask slide into place, loathing, as if he were the devil and she an angel. Ha! That was an understatement. Her hand stayed at her cheek, curling around her chin as chocolate hues which usually seemed alive with laughter, seemed to dance and place with fire. When he released her and took a step back, she swung, only it was an open palm, it was a balled fist that slammed into her face. She had swore the last time Jonathan had beat her, she would never be hit again, she would go down swinging if she had to! "DON'T you ever touch me again or I swear I'll kill you!" Her jaw locked in anger as she hissed the words at him. "I did what I was told to do! If you opened your eyes for two seconds past your own ambition, your own self worth you self righteous bastard, you would see that! But no..I don't give a damn what you think of me, a man with his eyes and heart and soul closed has no worth in my eyes. At least my eyes are open wider then yours. You don't know anything about Marke, you think you have a right to judge? If Marke was just following his appendages, then I wouldn't have to go so far as to hurt him, to rip the heart from his chest with one single lie. To kill everything Good within him so that he doesn't follow me into the shadows. Sure, your little friend..your little teenager, might be sweet and innocent but I know I am not and I'm not about to bring a good man into a bad world. So who's the better person then Vance? Me for letting go, or you for holding on? Hmm? I'm willing to rip my heart out in order to save another. Willing to devote myself completely to this and give my soul loyalty to Alen. So tell me, what the hell are you willing to do?" She knew very well and without a doubt the day she severed ties with Marke, she would die, not in the literal sense but she knew her heart would never be the same and yet she was still willing to do it. Still planning on it. That was the price on making a choice. She realized her hand was fingering the hidden place of the dagger Alen had given her and quickly dropped her hand and took a step back away from him.
Vance: "You... f**kin' idiot. " the punch would have barely phased him if he wasn't ragged tired, drunk, and at his wits end--because it did, it knocked him flat backward. She proceeded to lecture him, hitting a chord here and there, even momentarily realizing just how monumentally cruel it had been to hit a woman who abused for most of her life, rubbing his jaw and staring up at her with a cold, hard expression. "...It's Sorschal who's having me look after her, you git. You think I'd be bringing' her into this if I had a choice? I did it because of him... it'd be just a job if it wasn't--forget it. f**k you. You call me blind 'n you don't a god-damn thing yourself. " he snapped, irritably. He couldn't look at her now, but it was just as much guilt as disgust driving it now. "Why the hell are you even here, Ursula? Tell me that. What's it suddenly got you here? I know what I'm doin' here. Woulda been safer livin' in irons than getting involved in this nosense, but there's nothin' keepin' you here now. " his voice still remained, bitter and, for once, utterly exhausted. The humor of the distrust they had while serving the same man was utterly lost on him. "Jonathan's dead. You kin' go and have a stupid little fairytale life with the god-damn fop, for all anyone cares. Grow fat and have a buncha little children. and you're forcin' us to do the dirty work for you. Havin' Sorschal play at husband, or is that just a lil' fantasy of yours?" he scowled inwardly. "You don't know a god-damn thing, you don't know me, so stop actin' like you have my figured out at all... I'm doin' this for these people. The hell are you doin' this for?"
Ursula: "See. You call me an idiot, but I see more then you think I do.." She shifted, kneeling down to where she had knocked him down. Was there a touch of well ego in that she had knocked him down, even if he was drunk, yes. Just a smudge. "Alen...may have given you the assignment to look after her, but had you a choice, you wouldn't of brought her into it. Shows you care. An the fact you struck me..even as worthless as I am in your eyes, speaks very highly of your affection of her. Though lord knows what Alen see's in you, I'll never know..maybe there is some deeper reason in your, affection, then I am seeing, but I see it. You don't hide well behind masks. for that, you'll suffer.."What was she now a profit? Nope she merely, saw the world for what it was. Elbows rested against knees where were posed outward, seemingly in a froggy pose. One man in the dirt, another woman in the rain, just as muddy. Quite a sight but she wasn't figuring on anyone watching. "I don't want marriage and children, not that its any of your business, not cut out for it. Since you know, you see me so well. Surprised you didn't pick up on that."She sneered with a huff as her head shook and eyes rolled skyward, despite the rain. "I'm here, because there are other Jonathan's in the world, darker, smarter, and there are other Janice's and..."Ah hell who was another innocent she could pull up"Nathan's.."Aha!"in the world, in need of protection. These Jonathan's would see the world destroyed and I'd rather see people like Janice and people like Nathan in the world, making a difference. I've fought my whole life, to eat, for a good place to sleep at night, for money to make it through the day, for my life..I've seen the darkest corner of the world. So I...choice this, I accepted Alen's offer, so that good people in the world, like Janice, like Nathan, never have to see what I have seen..Never have to view the world as I've seen it." Her face turned downward and tilted to the side as she watched him, but he was not watching her. "I've played the victim, Vance, but really I've been the villain and I choose this, to change that around. To make a difference and because one man, saw me even through hundreds of layers of masks, saw me...saw the potential I never allowed myself and what I am now coming to understand is true...and I'll be damned, if someone like you...is going to take that away from me."The last was virtually spit out, bitter and dry as she shifted, rocking back on her heels to give her the momentum to life up again. Her gaze left his to the wall, rain soaked, it was virtually impossible and yet she was still contemplating how to beat, the impossible.
Vance: For a long time Vance said nothing. He wasn't sure if he believed it, or it made him like her any more, or anything. He felt some part of it, a similar thread but little else, enduring her points in silence, refusing to look at her, though the reasons why were left to him. He only spoke up again when she came near the wall, to which he'd reply. "...You're not approaching it right. Harder in the rain. Jumping too early, trying to get a footing. Jump late, push up. Should clear the extra distance. " he replied, almost mechanically, glowering silently. even he wasn't entirely sure what she saw in Sorschal, and he stood up and replied, rather coldly. "Sorschal'll be back in a few hours. Not takin' well to Janice hurtin' either. Might wanna talk to him." it was a far thing from being comfort--people did not have one argument and come to suddenly respect one another. Vance had an inkling of why she was here, that was all, and it wasn't enough to completely shift him anymore than her opinion changed about him. "Ya don't want my advice, but don't rush it. Physical part of the work takes time. Gonna take longer if ya hurt yourself..."
Ursula: Her head jerked, as if she were going to look at him then changed in the last second. She kept the mask so perfectly in place, never showing how she was breaking beneath, the weight of a choice was breaking her but in its place was a fierce devotion to never quit, to never give up, stay the course and be everything and more Alen saw in her. She had been so close to the breaking point, so many time she had second guessed but one thing had stayed on her mind the entire time. Alen's story of the courtesan he had known, it stilled her against just...lying in bed and refusing to get up. It forced her eyes to open wider, it forced her to move on, press on, to endure but most of all, to set her goals higher then herself. "Thanks"She mumbled in response. She didn't want help but well, she would accept it where it came. No sense in breaking an arm and being completely useless. "I will" She nodded to his words about Alen. When it came to Alen, she would do anything to see him at ease, to put a smile on his face. This surely would of made him sour but well, he couldn't coddle her with Vance. Things had to work out naturally. "I am sorry to hear about Janice..hope she recovers."For how cold it came out, it might of seemed untrue but it was true. She had only seen brief glimpses of the girl but she didn't want to see the tables turned and Janice in her situation, any part of situation that had been her life. "People like that..its the light in their eyes that people like me.."She stopped, she was giving away to much, but at this point though, she reasoned that she didn't well care. She was no physic but she knew once she broke Marke's heart and her own, that she was not going to be the same woman, better to get any softness out of the way now. "That kinda light isn't the one you wanna see go out. Cause suddenly the worlds a darker place when it does.." She took a step back and then another before launching herself at the wall. As he has said, she waited till the last second, her foot kicked out, pressing hard against rain slick boards, her face twisted, teeth bared in a silent growl as her hands reached for the top, latched on and she heaved upward, using her weight to swing her upward till she landed, straddling the wall. Boy that was going to hurt the inside of her thighs in the morning but she hadn't wanted to jump completely over it. There was reason to her madness. "I don't mind the pain, takes the edge off elsewhere. Lets the body know your alive." Hands gripped the wall to keep her balanced, seesawing the wall with her legs. Even she was avoiding looking at him.
Servant:The woman carrying a bowl of which who's contents even Ursula did not want to know, stared at her as if the woman was mad. "Yes..but...It's raining..."She commented simply.
Ursula:Ursula turned a pointed stare down at the woman. "I know.." She commented back before moving past the woman. Ebony Hall had quickly become somewhat of a second home so she did not feel guilt at intruding. Even in the spring downpour, Ursula had spent hours working the course. How was it going? She was muddy from head to toe and would be bruised in places she would never know you could get bruises by morning! As she grunted against the wood, straining to get over the wall of one part of it, she slipped and crashed into a mud puddle, for perhaps the fifth time. With a growl, she slapped at the mud puddle before leaning back against the wooden wall with a sigh. Alen had thought she was a star pupil and she couldn't' even make it over a damn wall!
Vance: "Well look at that." as things couldn't get bad enough in her torment, the last man she wished to see was watching. Alendral was currently maddening himself picking up pieces after the siege and the attack on Janice. In fact, the entire hall seemed breathless in distracted in the face of what happened. Arms crossed over his chest, nearly empty bottle in hand, the Rogue looked both horribly amused and utterly disgusted by what he saw. "Tryin' to keep yourself limber for the clients or just guilty enough to put half an effort into it for once?" the words slurred into one another, heedless of the rain, with a raw, emotional edge in his voice that was unmistakable--god, even his eyes were bloodshot. "Please... think it's fairly obvious only way your gonna be of any use is on your back, woman. Not foolin' anyone with your half-assed tries tonight." Was Vance being unfair? of course he was. The courses were difficult enough as is--soaked by rain they were nightmares, and were ALen to observe he would have balked at the idea, tried to pull her off the wall before she seriously hurt herself. "Pfft. Look at you. What's the matter? Last boy refuse to kiss you on the mouth?" he let himself smile, dark and vicious. Even in his bite, it was obvious--he was just looking for a way to get under her skin. Vance was looking to set her off.
Ursula: Her head jerked upward at the sound of the voice. At least the downfall was washing the mud off her face but she doubted getting the goopy mess out of her boots for a very long time. He was the last person in even hell(if she ever decided to believe in it) she wanted to see. "That's for me to know and you to never find out.."She shot back as she wiggled from the muddy pit the rain had created. "You know, you remind me of Marke sometimes Vance, except without the charm, the well...clean clothes and.."She leaned in, sniffed then jerked back with a disgusted look on her face."ug, the smell either..". Jerking the bottle from his hand, she surveyed the contents before turning swiftly to toss the bottle against the rain soaked wall. The bottle crashed and splintered, large to small glass shards seemed to glitter with the rain then disappeared, down into the mud. As irritated as she was, this was the least of what she could of done, she had only thought better of punching his ugly little face in. "What's the matter Vance? Jealous much?" She sneered as she turned back in his direction.
Vance: "And more money then sense, which is where it counts, doesn't it?" Seemed at least someone was more successful in their attempts, because the comparison was enough to make his skin crawl. "Hey!" he swore profusely as she bashed what was left of his bottle and that was it, between the stealing of his comfort and the dared suggestion that he was somehow jealous of her was enough to break what little control he had. "Jealous... JEALOUS!? The hell do you know, you selfish little tart!?" he grabbed both her arms and pushed her back than, eyes wide and almost animal, and he almost laughed. "Jesus christ you stupid bytch... Will you even look around 'ya!? You notice the halls thinning!? You notice how tired everyone looks! Half of the god-damn Noviates are DEAD and you're runnin' around tyin' up the boss to take care of your little social problems! Where were you, huh!? Where were you 'n all this? Stagin' a play? On your back with some lonely little rich bastard? Go on, tell me! You even know what the boss is doin' right now, huh? Or did you just assume..he'd have time, for your BULLchyt!?"
Ursula: She detested alcohol, it numbed the senses and make even the most hardened tongues loose, and the dumbest tongues to loose. Besides, he seemed to find comfort in the end of a bottle and what comfort she could ruin. Well, that was enough to satisfy her. Her jaw clenched as he shoved her back, she stumbled a step or two before recovering and shoving against him even as he brandished harsh and well, mean, words in her direction. "What the hell do you know you self absorbed jackass?! I have eyes wide open you a-hole! I see what's going on and I was smart enough to stay out of it and not join the dead! I am no where near ready to fight and I don't intend to waste the chance Alen gave me because YOU think little of me." She shoved again, fist balled, pounding against his chest. "Social Events?! As if I enjoy what's going on. I made a choice, not that you have any damn part in that! I'm making the hardest decision I ever had in putting my life into this business, into something that may as well kill me in the end!Alen may see more in me then I see myself, but I'll be damned if I disappoint him and I let some sniveling little dirty backhanded drunken criminal with a little girl complex try to run me off. f**k you Vance, you don't know a damn thing about me or what I'm going through.." In truth his words had hit her deep, she felt indeed...shallow and cruel, she did indeed get to self absorbed to notice what was going around her. Why hadn't she been called on? As unskilled as she was to fight, truly fight, had she turned her back on the order when they needed every available hand? She didn't let him see though, how his words had effected her, her face a stock shallow emptiness mixed with the rage. He saw her for exactly what she felt, and what Alen tried to dispel and that only made her all the madder.
Vance: Little girl complex was the last thing to say to Vance. he might have, however briefly, taken stock of her words if it didn't come with that, and for all his poise (or lack thereof) that sentiment turned his expression into pure hatred and he slapped the woman with a fair amount of force (to his credit, it was restrained enough considering how hard he could hit, however little that may have counted.) He didn't even say anything for a moment than, just glared daggers at her. "Don't you... ever call the dead stupid. They weren't ready either, you bytch. None of them were, but they fought and died to help anyway...!" of course Vance couldn't have known that Alen didn't call for her--that, quite the opposite, he had told her to stay in her chambers and to wait things out. to him, it was the sign of a coward and nothing more. "I went out there, and I fought for them, and I kept them alive, and that's more than you can say, so don't you... ever f**king question that. " he paused, wiped his mouth, hiding his anger neatly behind disrespect for the dead, till he blew it. "..And don't you talk about her like that ever again. Not ever. She's innocent." he finally had let her go during all this, rubbing his face and trying desperately to calm himself again. "And she's not wastin' our valuable time takin' care of some f**kin' inbred bastard followin' his richard... she nearly died. You're still here. Evidence of no God if I saw anythin'." the bitter hints of what perhaps made him so angry.
Ursula: She hadn't expected him to slap her, advance yes, shove, more definitely but the strike caught her off guard, her head jerked to the side before she brought it back, a hand rose to press against the faint throb of her cheek and lips were his hand had connected. For a moment the shock registered on her face before the mask slide into place, loathing, as if he were the devil and she an angel. Ha! That was an understatement. Her hand stayed at her cheek, curling around her chin as chocolate hues which usually seemed alive with laughter, seemed to dance and place with fire. When he released her and took a step back, she swung, only it was an open palm, it was a balled fist that slammed into her face. She had swore the last time Jonathan had beat her, she would never be hit again, she would go down swinging if she had to! "DON'T you ever touch me again or I swear I'll kill you!" Her jaw locked in anger as she hissed the words at him. "I did what I was told to do! If you opened your eyes for two seconds past your own ambition, your own self worth you self righteous bastard, you would see that! But no..I don't give a damn what you think of me, a man with his eyes and heart and soul closed has no worth in my eyes. At least my eyes are open wider then yours. You don't know anything about Marke, you think you have a right to judge? If Marke was just following his appendages, then I wouldn't have to go so far as to hurt him, to rip the heart from his chest with one single lie. To kill everything Good within him so that he doesn't follow me into the shadows. Sure, your little friend..your little teenager, might be sweet and innocent but I know I am not and I'm not about to bring a good man into a bad world. So who's the better person then Vance? Me for letting go, or you for holding on? Hmm? I'm willing to rip my heart out in order to save another. Willing to devote myself completely to this and give my soul loyalty to Alen. So tell me, what the hell are you willing to do?" She knew very well and without a doubt the day she severed ties with Marke, she would die, not in the literal sense but she knew her heart would never be the same and yet she was still willing to do it. Still planning on it. That was the price on making a choice. She realized her hand was fingering the hidden place of the dagger Alen had given her and quickly dropped her hand and took a step back away from him.
Vance: "You... f**kin' idiot. " the punch would have barely phased him if he wasn't ragged tired, drunk, and at his wits end--because it did, it knocked him flat backward. She proceeded to lecture him, hitting a chord here and there, even momentarily realizing just how monumentally cruel it had been to hit a woman who abused for most of her life, rubbing his jaw and staring up at her with a cold, hard expression. "...It's Sorschal who's having me look after her, you git. You think I'd be bringing' her into this if I had a choice? I did it because of him... it'd be just a job if it wasn't--forget it. f**k you. You call me blind 'n you don't a god-damn thing yourself. " he snapped, irritably. He couldn't look at her now, but it was just as much guilt as disgust driving it now. "Why the hell are you even here, Ursula? Tell me that. What's it suddenly got you here? I know what I'm doin' here. Woulda been safer livin' in irons than getting involved in this nosense, but there's nothin' keepin' you here now. " his voice still remained, bitter and, for once, utterly exhausted. The humor of the distrust they had while serving the same man was utterly lost on him. "Jonathan's dead. You kin' go and have a stupid little fairytale life with the god-damn fop, for all anyone cares. Grow fat and have a buncha little children. and you're forcin' us to do the dirty work for you. Havin' Sorschal play at husband, or is that just a lil' fantasy of yours?" he scowled inwardly. "You don't know a god-damn thing, you don't know me, so stop actin' like you have my figured out at all... I'm doin' this for these people. The hell are you doin' this for?"
Ursula: "See. You call me an idiot, but I see more then you think I do.." She shifted, kneeling down to where she had knocked him down. Was there a touch of well ego in that she had knocked him down, even if he was drunk, yes. Just a smudge. "Alen...may have given you the assignment to look after her, but had you a choice, you wouldn't of brought her into it. Shows you care. An the fact you struck me..even as worthless as I am in your eyes, speaks very highly of your affection of her. Though lord knows what Alen see's in you, I'll never know..maybe there is some deeper reason in your, affection, then I am seeing, but I see it. You don't hide well behind masks. for that, you'll suffer.."What was she now a profit? Nope she merely, saw the world for what it was. Elbows rested against knees where were posed outward, seemingly in a froggy pose. One man in the dirt, another woman in the rain, just as muddy. Quite a sight but she wasn't figuring on anyone watching. "I don't want marriage and children, not that its any of your business, not cut out for it. Since you know, you see me so well. Surprised you didn't pick up on that."She sneered with a huff as her head shook and eyes rolled skyward, despite the rain. "I'm here, because there are other Jonathan's in the world, darker, smarter, and there are other Janice's and..."Ah hell who was another innocent she could pull up"Nathan's.."Aha!"in the world, in need of protection. These Jonathan's would see the world destroyed and I'd rather see people like Janice and people like Nathan in the world, making a difference. I've fought my whole life, to eat, for a good place to sleep at night, for money to make it through the day, for my life..I've seen the darkest corner of the world. So I...choice this, I accepted Alen's offer, so that good people in the world, like Janice, like Nathan, never have to see what I have seen..Never have to view the world as I've seen it." Her face turned downward and tilted to the side as she watched him, but he was not watching her. "I've played the victim, Vance, but really I've been the villain and I choose this, to change that around. To make a difference and because one man, saw me even through hundreds of layers of masks, saw me...saw the potential I never allowed myself and what I am now coming to understand is true...and I'll be damned, if someone like you...is going to take that away from me."The last was virtually spit out, bitter and dry as she shifted, rocking back on her heels to give her the momentum to life up again. Her gaze left his to the wall, rain soaked, it was virtually impossible and yet she was still contemplating how to beat, the impossible.
Vance: For a long time Vance said nothing. He wasn't sure if he believed it, or it made him like her any more, or anything. He felt some part of it, a similar thread but little else, enduring her points in silence, refusing to look at her, though the reasons why were left to him. He only spoke up again when she came near the wall, to which he'd reply. "...You're not approaching it right. Harder in the rain. Jumping too early, trying to get a footing. Jump late, push up. Should clear the extra distance. " he replied, almost mechanically, glowering silently. even he wasn't entirely sure what she saw in Sorschal, and he stood up and replied, rather coldly. "Sorschal'll be back in a few hours. Not takin' well to Janice hurtin' either. Might wanna talk to him." it was a far thing from being comfort--people did not have one argument and come to suddenly respect one another. Vance had an inkling of why she was here, that was all, and it wasn't enough to completely shift him anymore than her opinion changed about him. "Ya don't want my advice, but don't rush it. Physical part of the work takes time. Gonna take longer if ya hurt yourself..."
Ursula: Her head jerked, as if she were going to look at him then changed in the last second. She kept the mask so perfectly in place, never showing how she was breaking beneath, the weight of a choice was breaking her but in its place was a fierce devotion to never quit, to never give up, stay the course and be everything and more Alen saw in her. She had been so close to the breaking point, so many time she had second guessed but one thing had stayed on her mind the entire time. Alen's story of the courtesan he had known, it stilled her against just...lying in bed and refusing to get up. It forced her eyes to open wider, it forced her to move on, press on, to endure but most of all, to set her goals higher then herself. "Thanks"She mumbled in response. She didn't want help but well, she would accept it where it came. No sense in breaking an arm and being completely useless. "I will" She nodded to his words about Alen. When it came to Alen, she would do anything to see him at ease, to put a smile on his face. This surely would of made him sour but well, he couldn't coddle her with Vance. Things had to work out naturally. "I am sorry to hear about Janice..hope she recovers."For how cold it came out, it might of seemed untrue but it was true. She had only seen brief glimpses of the girl but she didn't want to see the tables turned and Janice in her situation, any part of situation that had been her life. "People like that..its the light in their eyes that people like me.."She stopped, she was giving away to much, but at this point though, she reasoned that she didn't well care. She was no physic but she knew once she broke Marke's heart and her own, that she was not going to be the same woman, better to get any softness out of the way now. "That kinda light isn't the one you wanna see go out. Cause suddenly the worlds a darker place when it does.." She took a step back and then another before launching herself at the wall. As he has said, she waited till the last second, her foot kicked out, pressing hard against rain slick boards, her face twisted, teeth bared in a silent growl as her hands reached for the top, latched on and she heaved upward, using her weight to swing her upward till she landed, straddling the wall. Boy that was going to hurt the inside of her thighs in the morning but she hadn't wanted to jump completely over it. There was reason to her madness. "I don't mind the pain, takes the edge off elsewhere. Lets the body know your alive." Hands gripped the wall to keep her balanced, seesawing the wall with her legs. Even she was avoiding looking at him.